Important Questions to Ask Yourself Before Placing Your Baby for Adoption
An unexpected pregnancy does not have to be the end of the world. In fact, it can be a new beginning for both you and your baby. But first, you will have to make some difficult decisions. There are no clear or easy solutions for an unwanted pregnancy. Every birth mother has a different situation and unique circumstances.
Regardless of situations and circumstances, adoption has provided many birth mothers with a satisfying resolution to their unwanted pregnancy. Choosing adoption is a life-changing decision that affects both you and your child, and so having questions is only natural. Before making this decision, here are a few important questions to ask yourself before placing your baby for adoption in OK:
Why Should I Choose Adoption?
With an unwanted pregnancy, you may feel as though you have few options. In reality, you have three: parent your child, place your baby for adoption, or terminate your pregnancy. This is one of the toughest decisions of your life, but it is important that you make this choice yourself. Making a choice that you believe you will be able to live with is crucial. From experience, we know that a birth mother who makes a confident decision is comfortable with it and has peace of mind — even years down the road.
Such a life-altering decision requires a great deal of thought, especially while you contemplate your choices. Many women who experience an unwanted pregnancy find that they are unprepared or unwilling to be a parent at this point in their lives. For some, abortion is not an option that works for them either. If you have similar thoughts about parenting and abortion, then adoption can be the best solution and definitely worth considering. Only you can decide what is best for you and your child.
What Type of Adoption Should I Choose?
Once you have decided that adoption is the right choice for you, choosing the type of adoption you want will be one of your next steps. Adoption Choices of Oklahoma offers three types of adoption: open, semi-open, and closed. Open adoption provides you with the most customization and allows you the option to maintain a close relationship with both your child and the adoptive parents.
Semi-open adoption involves mediated communication between you and your child and allows you to maintain more privacy. Closed adoption means that once the child is born, you will no longer have contact with your child or the adoptive family.
You may struggle with this decision, but consider that how you feel now may change over time. This is not a decision that should be made lightly as it affects the future of both you and your baby. Open adoption tends to be the adoption type of choice as birth mothers find that the communication and individualization gives them peace of mind. Consider each type carefully and remember that you are the best advocate for you and your baby.
What Kind of Relationship do I Want with My Child?
Depending on where you are in your life, parenting may not be the ideal situation for you or your baby. Adoption is a choice made with love and care for your child and is not “giving up” in any way. While coming up with an adoption plan, you will have to ask yourself, What kind of relationship do I want with my child?
Closed adoptions can be emotionally challenging for birth mothers since there is no contact with the child involved and they may have regrets later. A semi-open or open adoption may be a better fit if you are seeking some type of future contact with your child. This could include, but is not limited to, letters, phone calls, or even visits. As the birth mother, the level of openness with your child is up to you.
What Kind of Relationship Do I Want with the Adoptive Family?
Part of your adoption plan will be choosing the adoptive family for your baby. Knowing that your child is with a family who will love and provide for them can help you feel reassured about your decision, especially if you are experiencing uncertainty and doubt. Your child’s adoptive family can become part of your support system and continue to be a positive addition to your life throughout the adoption process and beyond.
Forming a relationship with your child’s adoptive family can benefit everyone involved and lead to a lifelong relationship built on trust and communication.
Adoption Questions are Just as Important as Adoption Answers
Going through an unwanted pregnancy may feel overwhelming at first, but Adoption Choices of Oklahoma can help you create an adoption experience that you feel confident and comfortable with. There are many important questions you will need to ask yourself before placing your baby for adoption, and we are here to help you through them one by one.
You may not have all the answers now. That’s understandable. Just remember that asking the right questions will help guide you to the right answers for you and your baby.
Adoption Choices of Oklahoma is a private adoption agency, licensed by the state of Oklahoma and leader in the adoption community. We have been assisting birth parents, children, and adoptive families in Oklahoma for over 19 years. Our staff members are committed to providing an ethical, empowering, and personalized adoption experience to all involved in the adoption process. If you are currently in the process of adopting a baby and have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact us.
Toll-free: 800-898-6028 | OKC Local: 405-755-1999 | Tulsa Local: 918-447-7777 | Text: 405-310-8790 | Email
Meet the Author: Kristle Hailes is just your average, Alaska-born writer with a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and a dragon’s hoard of books and tea. In addition to educating young minds for over 12 years as a teacher, Kristle is also a professional daydreamer, world-builder, author-in-progress, and wordsmith. Writing is the air in her lungs, and she has been breathing life into paper ever since she learned her ABCs and realized you could play with words.
Kristle currently lives in South Carolina where she can usually be found face-deep in a book and a cup of tea or digging herself out of plot holes while working on the first novel of her adult contemporary fantasy series.