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How Intended Fathers can be Supportive in the Gestational Surrogacy Process

“Fatherhood is the greatest thing that could ever happen. You can’t explain it until it happens—it’s like telling someone what water feels like before they’ve ever swam in it.”

– Michael Buble

Just like your partner, there are steps that each one of you has or is taking to make your dreams of having a family a possibility. While we all wish it was as easy as a snap of the fingers, great things are worth waiting for. You and your partner will go through different emotions throughout the gestational surrogacy process, so it’s important to be supportive physically, emotionally and mentally.

Adoption Choices of Oklahoma knows that the Gestational Surrogacy process can be an emotional journey. But as the intended father, there are a few things that you can do to ensure that you’re supportive throughout the process. Showing support is essential.

Here is how you can be supportive through the gestational surrogacy process:

Lend an Ear

We all know how important it is to have someone there just to listen to us talk and say nothing. As a human, it can be hard not to have the answers for our loved ones, but you don’t need to have all the answers. You just need to be able to not only hear but also listen to what your partner is saying and how they’re feeling. Being present and willing to sit as she talks will make all the difference.

Physically Be Involved

As a man, there is only so much physically that you can do to bring a child into this world. With gestational surrogacy, there is sometimes even less but it doesn’t make the times that you can be involved any less meaningful or important.  So going to the appointments with your partner or the gestational carrier is important to show them physically you are present throughout this process.

Small Gestures

Even though we say “small gesture” what it really means is a gesture that makes a big impact on the heart. While going through the gestational surrogacy process is just that a process and can great more emotions than you are your partner never expected. So it is important to make time for the two of you, whether it be planning a date night, going on a Sunday hike, or just staying in for a movie night. Little gestures like picking up your partners’ favorite candy, buying them flowers, sending them a random text telling them how much you love them, or even making their favorite meal are all small gestures that let your partner know you are thinking of them.  Small gestures don’t have to be expensive or lavish, just from the heart.

Being Supportive as an Intended Father

Having a child is an emotional rollercoaster, but Adoption Choices of Oklahoma is here to ensure the process is a smooth one. Intended fathers are the unsung heroes of gestational surrogacy. You are there through thick and thin. Just simple acts like listening and being physically present are huge. As the intended father, you need to remember that you are just as invested and involved in this as your partner or spouse and that your support is crucial.


“60 Touching Dad Quotes That Sum Up What It’s Like To Be A Father”. Country Living, 2020,


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