What is Closed Adoption and Why is it Okay to Choose?
When making the decision to place your child for adoption, there is a good chance you did a lot of research on your unplanned pregnancy options. You’ve likely searched the internet far and wide and have read countless blogs (like this one!) to learn all there is to know about the choices available to women facing an unwanted pregnancy. Now that you have decided to move forward with adoption, the next step is choosing a type of adoption.
Adoption Choices of Oklahoma offers three types of adoption: open, semi-open, and closed. While we specialize in open adoptions, we encourage you to make the right choice for you. Learning more about closed adoption is the first step in choosing the best option for yourself. Looking for more information on closed adoption before making your decision? Read on for a more in-depth answer to two important questions for any birth mother considering adoption: What is closed adoption and why is it okay to choose?
What is Closed Adoption?
Closed adoption is very straightforward – it means that you have agreed to not have any contact with the child or their adoptive family once you have placed your child for adoption. In addition, there will be no communication from your child or their adoptive family. This also means that you will not be provided any information about the family who adopts your child.
Any records identifying you as the birth mother will be sealed by the court, and will not be opened until the child has turned 18 years of age. Before then, neither the child nor the adoptive family will have access to that information at any time.
How do I Know if Closed Adoption is Right for Me?
Now that we have a better understanding of what to expect with closed adoption, let’s explore why this is a perfectly valid adoption choice for you and birth mothers like you. Closed adoption is just as much an acceptable choice as the other two types – the main differences are which one works best for your specific situation and how it makes you feel.
Adoption in any form is an incredible act of selflessness. You have created a life and made the choice to bring joy to a family in a unique and extraordinary way. There is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of in choosing closed adoption nor should anyone judge you for your decision. No one can tell you how you feel or how to feel.
Before you make the decision to choose closed adoption, think about how you will feel about your choice in the future. Do you see yourself regretting your decision? Or do you see yourself at peace with it? These are questions you must ask yourself with an open and honest heart. While this type of adoption may be less common nowadays and some birth mothers may experience grief or regret during the adoption process, this can be said for any of the types of adoption, not just closed adoption.
Choosing Closed Adoption is Valid
Choosing closed adoption does not mean that you do not love your child or that you don’t want what is best for them. Love comes in many forms and this is your way of showing your child how much you care about them and want them to have a happy life. This can be a fresh start and lead to a bright future for all parties involved.
Closed adoption is an option because every woman is different, has unique circumstances, and deserves to have choices available that suit her individual needs. Whatever you decide, just remember that your decision is valid, and you deserve to not feel ashamed of your choice.
Adoption is Love
We hope this resource has been helpful in providing an answer to: What is closed adoption and why is it okay to choose? We at Adoption Choices of Oklahoma recognize and respect that open and semi-open adoption are not the right fit for everyone. If you are not comfortable with either of those options, then closed adoption may be exactly what you’re looking for.
Take your time, think carefully about your options, and always listen to your feelings. Remember — adoption of any type can be a wonderful and fulfilling experience and you are giving a family a beautiful gift. Closed adoption is adoption, and while adoption types may differ, they are all special and important in their own unique ways.
Adoption Choices of Oklahoma is a private adoption agency, licensed by the state of Oklahoma and leader in the adoption community. We have been assisting birth parents, children, and adoptive families in Oklahoma for over 19 years. Our staff members are committed to providing an ethical, empowering, and personalized adoption experience to all involved in the adoption process. If you are currently in the process of adopting a baby and have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact us.
Toll-free: 800-898-6028 | OKC Local: 405-755-1999 | Tulsa Local: 918-447-7777 | Text: 405-310-8790 | Email
Meet the Author: Kristle Hailes is just your average, Alaska-born writer with a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and a dragon’s hoard of books and tea. In addition to educating young minds for over 12 years as a teacher, Kristle is also a professional daydreamer, world-builder, author-in-progress, and wordsmith. Writing is the air in her lungs, and she has been breathing life into paper ever since she learned her ABCs and realized you could play with words.
Kristle currently lives in South Carolina where she can usually be found face-deep in a book and a cup of tea or digging herself out of plot holes while working on the first novel of her adult contemporary fantasy series.