What Will People Think of Me if I Give My Baby Up for Adoption?
Adoption is a hard choice, and this decision is one of the hardest you will ever make in your life. When you make your decision, some people will have different opinions. This can affect you emotionally and can affect your choices. This may push you to keep this process private, but remember that there are people who support you and your decision. You are the main decision-maker, so whatever you choose is valid. You are in charge of your pregnancy and adoption story.
There may be a divide of opinionated people in your life. Some may support you in all of your decisions for yourself and your child, and some may not support your decisions and don’t understand what you are going through. Some will wonder why you decided this for yourself and your child, and they will wonder if you will get your child back. Some will tell you how brave you are and how you are making the best decision for yourself and your child. There will be negativity and positivity that comes your way, so it’s best to keep the positivity around you.
Here at Adoption Choices of Oklahoma, we want to help you through your adoption process. If you need someone to talk to, we have counseling for birth mothers. We have professionals who are available 24/7 to answer all of your questions. You are not alone. You have support around you.
They’ll Wonder Why You Gave Your Child Away
For whatever reason you chose adoption, you don’t need to tell people why. We know that it could be out of love, it could be because you are not financially stable to raise a baby, you may be too young to raise a baby, or you may not be ready to give up your life for a child right now. Whatever it may be, it is completely valid, but we know that people will ask why.
You don’t need to explain yourself. If you don’t feel comfortable telling the person who is asking why you chose adoption, that is okay. It is okay to keep this answer to yourself. If you do feel comfortable, tell them why, but only if you know they will support you and try and understand
Adoption, although it’s not an easy choice, is a great option. When an unexpected pregnancy occurs, there are a few different options for you. Raise the child on your own, have an abortion, or put your baby up for adoption. No matter what you choose, people will ask why. People won’t understand that it is the best option for you.
No matter what you choose, there will be people who will judge you for your decision. This can be hurtful and frustrating, but we are here to be a support team for you. If you chose adoption, that is the best choice for you. Not many people other than birth mothers will understand what you are going through. You are going through something so difficult. Only you fully understand that. Surrounding yourself with people who, although you don’t understand, try to and support you through the full process is important.
Some Will Not Be Understanding
Many people will not understand the struggles that you are going through during this scary time. An unexpected pregnancy is not easy, especially if you are not in the right place to raise a child. Unfortunately, some people will not be understanding of your decision. This could be because of your decision to place your baby for adoption or the type of adoption you are choosing. If you need privacy after this unexpected pregnancy, that is okay. You can choose a closed adoption if that is the best option for you.
Some people may think that you don’t want anything to do with your child, but we know that that is not true. Adoption is something a lot of birth mothers choose based on the love they have for their child. We know that you want your child to have a healthy and happy life and to be a part of a loving family that you can’t give him or her right now. Some people will never understand how hard of a decision this is for you, and they will never understand that it was the best choice out of many options.
Are You Going to Get Your Child Back?
Many may think that your child is going temporarily to another home to be raised by adoptive parents, but this is not true. You will not be getting your child back. You are putting your child up for adoption to be raised by other parents for a reason. You may not be fit to raise your child right now, and that is okay. People have many misconceptions when it comes to adoption and topics like this, but do not let them get you down with their multiple questions. You are doing this for you and your child.
If someone asks you these types of questions, you don’t need to answer, or you can simply tell them no. Another option is to educate them on adoption in Oklahoma. Many don’t know what adoption entails, and educating them can help them understand and not be judgemental. It can open their mind and help them see life from a different perspective.
You’re Really Brave
Birth mothers are one of the strongest people. You go through two traumatic experiences, both an unexpected pregnancy and adoption. You didn’t plan on becoming pregnant, and you probably didn’t want this right now. Choosing adoption is one of the strongest things you can do. You might not be in the right place to raise a child, or you might be in a situation where you don’t want to raise your child with the birth father. Whatever it may be, you are brave for making that first step and reaching out to an adoption caseworker to start your adoption process.
Adoption is very brave to choose because you want to make sure that your child has the happy, healthy, and loving family and home you wish you could give them. That is the bravest and most selfless thing you could do. Putting your child first before anything is the strongest thing you can do as a mother in general. Anyone who has never had an unexpected pregnancy or been a birth mother themselves will ever fully understand what you are going through.
Contact Us If You Need Adoption Support Now in Oklahoma
There are so many different opinions that people will have when you are choosing adoption or deciding. Try and surround yourself with people who support you and your decisions. Surrounding yourself with positivity is the best thing you can do when going through adoption because it is an emotional time.
Here at Adoption Choices of Oklahoma, we have 24/7 professionals who will help you if you need support. We understand how much of a struggle going through all of this is, and we want to help you. We don’t want you to go through this alone because you are not alone. There are so many birth mothers who have been through similar struggles, so you are not the only one.
Adoption Choices of Oklahoma is a private adoption agency, licensed by the state of Oklahoma and leader in the adoption community. We have been assisting birth parents, children, and adoptive families in Oklahoma for over 19 years. Our staff members are committed to providing an ethical, empowering, and personalized adoption experience to all involved in the adoption process. If you are currently in the process of adopting a baby and have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact us.
Toll-free: 800-898-6028 | OKC Local: 405-755-1999 | Tulsa Local: 918-447-7777 | Text: 405-310-8790 | Email
Meet the Author: Molly Allington is an aspiring author born and raised in Syracuse, New York. When she’s not watching her latest Netflix obsession, you can find her nose deep in a book or in her writing. She has been writing books since she was twelve and is in the process of trying to get her finished books published. Molly has a BA in Creative Writing from Southern New Hampshire University. With her writing, she is hoping to share supportive information and help as many people as possible. Once she starts her own family, she is wanting to adopt.
